This week marks one whole year since our beautiful little one came home.

It feels impossible that twelve months have passed already. Some days it feels as though our little one has always been here, filling the house with laughter, cuddles and endless energy. Other days I can still remember every emotion from those first few weeks as though they happened yesterday.

One year is not a long time, but when you become a kinship carer, every single day feels significant. Every cuddle, every milestone and every tiny step forward carries so much meaning because you know what came before it.

Our little one was just five and a half months old when life changed for all of us. We became kinship carers and, just one month later, we became Special Guardians under a Special Guardianship Order.

Those titles mattered legally, but inside our home something much simpler was happening. We were becoming a family.

Those Ten Days That Changed Everything

Before our little one came home, we had a ten day transition from foster care into our family.

Looking back now, I honestly believe those ten days made a huge difference.

For the first few days I visited the foster carer’s home, spending a couple of hours getting to know our little one in familiar surroundings. Those visits gradually became longer until they stretched into half days.

Then we swapped things around.

The foster carer started bringing our little one to our house, staying for a while before leaving us together. Those visits slowly became longer too until eventually our home no longer felt unfamiliar.

It became another safe place.

On the final day we drove to collect our little one and brought them home.

I can still picture that journey.

It was only a short drive, but it felt like the beginning of an entirely new chapter for all of us.

The Mixture of Joy and Fear

People often imagine that becoming a kinship family is simply a happy occasion.

Of course it was.

We had waited so long for this moment.

At the same time, we were carrying so many worries.

Our little one had already experienced more change in such a short life than any baby ever should. Having lived with the foster carer since just a few weeks old, we naturally wondered how confusing another move might feel.

Would our little one cry constantly?

Would they miss the only home they had known?

Would they settle?

Would they feel safe with us?

We simply did not know.

Looking back now, I think that uncertainty is something many kinship carers quietly carry. You desperately want to make everything better, yet you also understand that healing cannot be rushed.

All we could offer was consistency, patience and unconditional love.

That was enough to begin building trust.

Watching Our Little One Find Security

During those first few weeks our little one was remarkably content.

There were very few tears.

There were endless cuddles.

Most of the time our little one simply wanted to be close to me or my husband.

One thing I noticed quite quickly, though, was that laughter rarely came.

There were smiles, but not the carefree giggles you naturally expect from a baby.

At the time I remember wondering whether those joyful moments would eventually come.

Slowly, they did.

First came the smiles.

Then the giggles.

Before long our home echoed with squeals of excitement and infectious laughter.

Watching our little one grow in confidence remains one of the greatest privileges of my life.

Attachment is not something you can force.

Trust grows quietly through ordinary moments.

Morning cuddles.

Bedtime stories.

Gentle routines.

Familiar faces.

Hundreds of small moments that slowly tell a child they are safe.

Every Milestone Felt Like a Celebration

This first year has been filled with milestones.

Weaning.

Crawling.

Walking.

Teething.

First words.

New adventures.

New discoveries.

Watching our little one develop has been one of the greatest joys I have ever experienced.

It was never just about reaching developmental milestones.

It was about watching confidence grow.

Seeing curiosity replace uncertainty.

Watching a little personality emerge that had perhaps been waiting for the right environment to flourish.

Children are incredibly resilient when they feel safe enough to simply be children.

The Little Things I Never Want to Forget

When I think back over this first year, it is not the big occasions I remember most.

It is the everyday moments.

Our little one has always loved cuddles.

We can sit together for ages, simply snuggled up on the sofa. Those quiet moments are some of my favourites.

Whenever Jacob comes for a cuddle, our little one quickly decides there is room for one more, so we usually end up tangled together in a three way cuddle that makes us all laugh.

Books have become another favourite.

Reading together has always been important in our home and now our little one happily climbs onto my lap whenever a story begins. If I am reading with Jacob, our little one joins us too, listening carefully before clapping with delight at favourite pages.

Then there is the dancing.

Music starts playing and one of us is immediately expected to get up.

Sometimes it is me.

Sometimes my husband.

Sometimes Jacob becomes the chosen dance partner.

Watching them both holding hands as they dance around the living room is one of those ordinary moments that somehow becomes unforgettable.

Drawing has become another favourite pastime.

Whenever Jacob sits down with paper and crayons, our little one is never far behind.

Most of the masterpieces stay on paper.

A few have found their way onto the walls.

Such is life.

Playing alongside the boys has become another daily adventure.

Whether they are racing cars across the floor, building worlds with Imaginext, cooking imaginary meals in the wooden kitchen or simply rolling around being wonderfully silly together, our little one throws themselves into every game with complete joy.

Bath time is always filled with bubbles, splashing and laughter.

Being outdoors is equally exciting.

Swings.

Puddles.

Climbing.

Running.

Exploring.

Children have an incredible way of reminding us to slow down and appreciate simple things.

Then there are the teddies.

Our little one absolutely adores them.

Tiny teddies.

Huge teddies.

Old favourites.

New arrivals.

The collection seems to grow every month and somehow there is always room for another.

What This First Year Has Taught Me

Becoming a kinship carer changed every part of our lives.

It changed our routines.

Our priorities.

The future we thought we had planned.

It also changed me.

Over this past year I have learned that healing does not happen because of one grand gesture.

Healing happens through consistency.

Through showing up every single day.

Through calm voices during difficult moments.

Through cuddles when words are not enough.

Through patience when behaviour is really communication.

Living this life has taught me to celebrate progress instead of perfection.

It has taught me to look beyond behaviour and ask what my little one might be trying to tell me.

Most of all, it has taught me that children thrive when they know they belong.

One Year Later

If someone had asked me a year ago what this first year would look like, I could never have imagined just how much happiness our little one would bring into our home.

There have been challenges.

There have been worries.

There have been moments of complete exhaustion.

There has also been more love than I ever thought possible.

One year ago we brought our little one home.

Today our home is filled with laughter, cuddles, dancing, books, muddy footprints, crayons, teddies and memories I will treasure forever.

If you have recently become a kinship carer or are beginning your own Special Guardianship journey, I hope our story reassures you.

The early days can feel uncertain.

Attachment takes time.

Trust takes time.

Families take time.

Keep showing up.

One ordinary day at a time.

Because one day you’ll look around and realise those ordinary days quietly became the foundation of something extraordinary.

About me

I am a married mother of four children. One of those four children is our granddaughter, for whom we are SGO (legal guardians)/kinship carers. I run a small business and enjoy writing, so I blog. My blog focuses on my family life as well as my experiences of living with chronic illnesses and disabilities such as ME/CFS, spinal stenosis, chronic pain, and fibromyalgia. Oh, and I am only in my mid-40s.